11.4.10

Makes No Difference

"Everything changes eventually. That’s just the way life is and you have no control over it. Like suddenly people who you think are always going to be there, they disappear. You know? People die and they move away and they grow up."
Joey, in Dawson's Creek

We can't help but re-evaluate our entire life every once in a while. And when you do that, rather than the good things, you often find yourself spending more of your time remembering the bad things, living the hardest situations you have been through.. over and over again, even when you tell yourself to just stop and move on. More than the bad moments, you focus on the moments that changed your life, that changed something you wanted to stay the same. It's true. Who has never thought about a period of their life and just wished to go back in time and live those days for an undefined period of time? Who hasn't said already "I wish things never changed..."? We all did, remember it or not.

Is it wrong to think about that? Honestly.. I don't know the answer.
Is it normal? To that I would say yes.

Thinking about stuff that happened before doesn't necessarily mean being stuck in the past. I think about it through other perspective. For me, thinking about that, is more about trying to understand what we had.. and what happened for them to disappear. Sometimes we should know that just to see if it was a mistake made by us so we won't make it again in the future, others we need to see if the mistake came from the other side and, in that case, learn with the past situation so we won't get caught in a similar one, and, in other moments, we just need to figure out that there's nothing good or bad about the change. It's just change. It's just life and its course. Its destiny, it is what's meant to happen, no matter if you believe in that or not.. it is. Every action we have lead us to an end. To a final situation. Our efforts in the end means almost nothing because there's no difference.

We all grow up, we all build our characters through years, we all develop our own ideas... Off course they mean a change in our life, but that's the thing, change is necessary. And, yes! No matter what, our beliefs, ideas or past mistakes, we all gonna face change. It's in us. In every single one of us. It's not a decision. Not one made by us.

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